April 6, 2013

Who among us is perfect? As human beings, is it possible for us to be perfect creatures who never make mistakes? No, it is not possible. We may live our lives the best we can and try not to harm anyone, but we are not perfect and to expect perfection in ourselves and others is not a realistic or healthy expectation.

After the Storm by Paul Bica

Photo Credit: paul bica via Compfight cc

We strive to be the best we can, but when we make mistakes, we must acknowledge and learn from them. We must try not to make the same mistake twice. We love ourselves enough to forgive ourselves. Therefore, as we know, we can make mistakes and need to forgive ourselves when we make them. We must also forgive others when they make mistakes and have offended us in some way.

There are times when you may have done something inadventently to hurt someone that you love. I don’t think anyone deliberately sets out to hurt someone they love, but it can happen, often without any intention. When this happens, you are probably hardest on yourself when you have realized what you have done. You are your worst judge and jury, and you may find it difficult to forgive yourself. However, you must forgive yourself and ask the forgiveness of the person you have offended. Even if that person decides not to forgive you, you must forgive yourself and not harbor any ill feelings or bitterness in your heart. Bitterness, resentment, and anger tears you down. Forgiveness builds you back up, and fills your heart with joy and hope, and enables you to be the best you can be.

Forgive someone today who has hurt you. It may be difficult to forgive that person but if you do, you will free yourself from your negative feelings. Your heart will soar, and be full of joy and peace. Everyone deserves a second chance. Everyone.

With deepest warmth,

Mimi Luk

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Mimi Luk

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Mimi Luk is a personal and professional life coach. Grateful to be alive as a kidney recipient, she is also a health and wellness advocate. Mimi has achieved her knowledge and insight from both personal and professional circumstances to allow her to become an empathetic coach. Her experiences have made her a true believer in the power of intent and the unlimited possibilities of transformation. Currently writing her first book, she believes it will inspire readers to begin their journey of self-discovery, and to have an abundant life filled with peace, love, and joy. Please contact Mimi for information on coaching sessions in-person, by phone, or online via Skype.

10 responses to Forgiveness

  1. Hello from Toronto. I read on Twitter that you write a book, but don’t see any information about it in your website. Is is a non-fiction book with messages about life like you write in your blog?

  2. HI Giora. I am in the process of writing a book. It is a non-fiction book not only with messages about life as I write in my blog, but goes into much more detail about the life lessons I have learned. I share my knowledge of what it takes to have a life filled with joy, peace, authenticity and abundance and give readers tools to help them in their life journey. I hope to empower and inspire others to be their best. My wish is for people to have meaningful lives and to discover their life purpose and achieve their dreams which will, in turn, make this world a better place for all of us.

    There will be more information on my website as I continue to work on it. It is a very new website so much more work still needs to be done on it. Thank you for reading my blog, Giora, and hope you are having a wonderful weekend.

  3. Such a positive and true message, Mimi! I’d been holding a grudge against someone until I confronted them about it last year. After I expressed my feelings, I felt such a huge weight lifted from me and I was finally able to forgive the person. It was so liberating! It taught me that forgiveness is vital because it frees us!

    • Hi Dana. Thank you so much for your lovely comments and for sharing with me. Yes, that is so true that it is liberating when you finally let go of grudges. We only hurt ourselves by hanging on to grudges. It is ourselves we are healing by showing mercy and forgiveness to those who have wronged us! We must make the conscious choice to forgive and the faster we forgive, the faster we can move on to being a healthier and happier person. Take care, Mimi

  4. To try and expect perfect only causes turmoil in our lives.

    • Thanks for your comment, Kathryn. Yes, it is unrealistic to expect perfection because we are only human and are not perfect creatures. As such, it is important to forgive ourselves and others for imperfection. Otherwise, we hurt ourselves more by not being able to forgive.

  5. Thoughtful and reflective post Mimi. Good advice to always remember. 🙂

  6. There has been alot of hurtful words and behavior between my ex and myself. Just when I believe that I have truly forgiven him, something else happens and I am back to square one! Physically and emotionally, I have moved on… I am in another relationship with a man who truly makes me happy. He and I have discussed that I need to ‘tie up lose ends’. I have started the proceedings, but courts have their own time frame.

    Is forgiveness part of the ‘loose ends’?

    • Hello Delana. Thanks for reading my article and for your comments and questions. It’s difficult for me to answer your question as I’m not sure if I completely understand what you mean by “loose ends”. Could you please tell me what you mean when you say “loose ends”? Also, when you refer to starting “proceedings”, do you mean you’ve started divorce proceedings?

      I’d just like more clarification so I can properly answer your question, but I suspect my answer would be that forgiveness is part of the “loose ends”. Forgiveness means to stop feeling anger and to stop blaming. It’s a conscious, deliberate decision to release feelings of resentment or vengeance toward someone who has harmed you, regardless of whether he actually deserves your forgiveness. I believe there’s no such thing as “partial forgiveness”. You either forgive or you don’t. There is no in between. The forgiveness has to be complete before you can truly feel liberated and at peace. As such, I believe forgiveness is part of the “loose ends”.